Next to the Norwalk River, right before it passes under a busy bridge on I-95 sits the St. Ann’s club. The last Wednesday of every month about 200 men from this Italian fraternal association gather for dinner. Outside, they smoke and talk on their cellphones. Inside they have their drinks and slap each other on the backs.

At the entrance to the hall stands a statue of St. Ann with a blue ribbon, looking down at her daughter dressed in blue. Most people walk right by the statue without a notice, although one or two people make the sign of the cross as they walk by.

I wonder about St. Ann’s life. What were things like when she was young and taking care of her daughter? Did she belong to a social club where she took her daughter? Did she hope that her daughter would live a nice simple life, get married have kids? Did she expect that grandson would change the lives of many people?

When the Mayor showed up, I wondered about his life as well and that of his parents. Did John’s father, a New Haven cop ever expect his son to go on to become Mayor of New Haven and a Gubernatorial candidate? Did he expect his son to play a key role in bringing down the crime rate in New Haven?

The Mayor waded into the crowd. He sat with various people and talked about his life and why he was running for Governor. He told the story of how when he had been Mayor for six weeks, he went to a funeral of a six month old baby girl that had been killed by gunfire. The bullet had hit the girl’s grandmother, and traveled on to kill the baby girl.

What had been the expectations of the grandmother? What had been her hopes and dreams? It is when we think about these hopes and dreams that we learn more about what we must do. That year, there were 34 murders in New Haven. Mayor DeStefano has brought that number dramatically down.

As we ate and the Mayor talked, his finance director urged him to go mingle more. The Mayor doesn’t seem to be a good politician the way things have been done in the recent past. He isn’t a person for the quick handshake a word or two, and on to the next voter. He wants to get into discussions. He wants to hear from people and talk with them. It may not be the type of politics that people have been practicing in the recent past, but it is the kind of politics we need more of.

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As the Mayor spoke with different people around the room, I had pasta, potatoes, broccoli, meat, and some home made wine. The food had been prepared by members of the club. We talked about how hard it is to cook for two hundred people yet about how our wives and mothers often find it harder to cook for smaller groups than for larger groups. There is nothing like a good Italian meal for building community. One person talked about how once, a sheriff came to serve his brother papers for some civil suit. His mother started talking with the sheriff and the sheriff ended up staying for dinner.

Ti p O’Neill once said, “All politics is local”. Others have refined it to “All politics is personal”. The Mayor does a great job of bringing regular people into politics, of making politics personal, and not losing the personal touch at a dinner of two hundred, just as the cooks at St. Ann’s club kept the homemade touch to the dinner, even though they were feeding two hundred.

We all need to work on this personal touch to politics, on this blog, and to all aspects of our lives.